Archive for January, 2012

Celebrating Chinese New Year with My Adopted Daughter – thoughts

Tuesday, January 31st, 2012

I really appreciated KJ Dell’Antonia’s Motherlode Post “Celebrating Chinese New Year with My Adopted Daughter” where she shares honest thoughts about being Caucasian  raising a Chinese-born adopted daughter along with three other biological children.  The annual Chinese New Year’s festivities and her pledge to honor her daughter’s birth heritage spurred the reflection which is worth reading for anyone thinking about issues of identity and intersections with global culture(s).  I got to thinking what happens after a few generations have grown up “different,” and submitted the comment below.  If you read the article on the link above, also be sure to read the thoughtful (and some incendiary) comments.

Photo credit: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/45930633/ns/us_news/t/adopted-kids-mini-ambassadors-come-lunar-new-year/#.TygeFnrcCvg

My comment as published:

Weighing in late, but I love this post, KJ.  I remember growing up when we’d hear the tsk-tsk of folks who’d say “We worry about what will happen to the children (of international adoptions and inter-racial or inter-faith marriages).”  But the determining factor seemed to be the loving and encouraging environment at home, as well as on-going, honest conversations, and finding or creating a supportive community (as it seems you have), not whether everyone under that roof had the same shape of eye, hair texture or affiliation.  What’s awesome as those children are getting married and having their own children is this melding of SO MANY more cultures in the next generation(s).  So the English-Iranian wife married to the Swiss-Congolese husband raising a child in Philadelphia who looks Puerto Rican isn’t such an anomaly – and she loves every piece of who she is. Embracing the world – sometimes in the form of our children, our sons-in-law, and godmothers -  gives us more chances to grow and to love, even when it’s confusing or uncomfortable.
(PS: Thanks to my Italian friend Kate, married to Jewish Richard with 2 Chinese children (out of 4) for reminding me of this piece!)

 

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Thank you, Brilliant Star!

Friday, January 27th, 2012

I was so honored to be featured in the latest issue of Brilliant Star magazine.  Here’s a blurb I wrote about what I think of this publication:

“My daughters range in age from elementary school to college. We’ve been reading Brilliant Star magazine for at least ten years, and the excitement of getting each new issue in the mail hasn’t worn off – for any of us. Each month the quality of moral and spiritual education themes, creative activities, and examples of making the world a better place surpass our expectations. For the children it’s a fun magazine just for them, and as a parent it’s been a trusted companion offering countless examples and inspiration for raising a balanced, loving, happy, insightful, and active global citizen. Thank you, Brilliant Star, for elegantly educating, entertaining, engaging, and inspiring like no other publication does!”

And here’s the PDF of the piece:

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“At Home in the World” Parents Magazine Feature

Thursday, January 26th, 2012

The December 2011 issue of Parents Magazine featured a story on global learning for families, drawing from a number of experts in the field, like the inspiring Dana Mortenson of World Savvy.  I was honored to be contacted for the story, and that the title of the story ended up being the subtitle of Growing Up Global, “At Home in the World.”  Also, that the action tips were drawn from suggestions in Growing Up Global.  Here are images of the pages; sorry if they look blurry on your screen.  I think you can see their Tips on the second page.

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You Don’t Have to Be Chinese to Celebrate the Year of the Dragon – Lunar New Year

Sunday, January 22nd, 2012

The Year of the Dragon celebrations offer a great opportunity to grow our understanding of the world – while having fun with our kids.  Before you good-intentionally blurt out “Happy Chinese New Year,” to colleagues and neighbors – stop!  “Chinese New Year” represents a subset of the cultures that celebrate.  It’s also a festivity in Vietnam, Korea, Japan, Nepal, Thailand, Mongolia, Brunei, Indonesia, and more, with some of the biggest festivals taking place in Canada and Australia.  So, say “Happy Lunar New Year!” And some call it Spring Festival, even though to many of us in colder locales that feels like a stretch.

You also don’t have to be East Asian to celebrate.  My family is Iranian-American and some of our favorite memories are of making fresh dumplings with neighbors in the deep winter for the New Year, attending Philadelphia’s Chinatown parade followed by a dim sum feast with transplants from four continents, and for our girls, wearing the traditional Chinese silk brocade dress, that comes in every color and size.

I was struck by President Obama’s 40-second Lunar New Year greeting (click here to watch), which he put in the context of his own fond memories: “growing up in Hawaii I remember all the excitement surrounding the Lunar New Year, from the parades and the fireworks to the smaller gatherings with family and friends.  It’s always been a time for celebration and for hope. ” He also uses this as an occasion to remind Americans that we gain strength from our diversity – a message that can resonate whatever your political leanings (unless, of course, you think that Mitt Romney’s French language abilities are a liability).

Did the President celebrate with his Kansan grandparents, who were vital to his upbringing and support system, or with his mother after her return from Indonesia, or more likely, with all of them, since Lunar New Year has been integrated into Hawaiian life, too?  These celebrations may have been formative to the American President who has been criticized for stating he is “an American citizen and a citizen of the world.”  Having a personal experience of something as joyous and free from an agenda as celebrating a new holiday with friends can widen the vision of the possibilities for our own lives, especially at a formative age: what second language we might learn, where we might study or do business, who our friends and loved ones can be, art that resonates, food and music we enjoy, and more.  It also helps us become more compassionate to the lives of others – near or far.

This year is particularly portentous as the Year of the Dragon, a symbol of power and excellence, courage, heroism and perseverance, nobility and divinity. With all the power a dragon has, he uses it benevolently.  This wisdom and restraint is a source of wealth and respect.

So, make dumplings; finally learn how to eat gracefully with chopsticks; learn a phrase in Mandarin or Vietnamese; reach out to a new immigrant family in your community; or get to know the couple that runs the ethnic shop nearby.  And imagine: how will you be a wise and kind dragon, radiant on the inside, spreading beauty and promise on the outside?

 

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5 Ways Families Can Honor Dr. King & The Dream

Sunday, January 8th, 2012

I think it’s essential that kids grow up with memories of actively marking the Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. holiday and birthday.  At most schools this is a day off, and a growing movement advocates making this a “day on.”  When parents engage with their children on the important matters Dr. King spoke out for, it sticks.  Here are 5 simple steps to get started.

Volunteer.  Search local churches, service organizations, interfaith coalitions, and school groups for a volunteer activity you can plug into.  You can look up the official National Service Day website, plug in your zip code and find out what’s going on: http://mlkday.gov.  Talk about some of the service options you’ve found over dinner (or whenever your family can best have a conversation), so that this becomes an activity you all own, care about, and look forward to.

Read – more, new, different.  Spend time educating your family on the sacrifices made to begin realizing racial justice and equality in the United States (or elsewhere, like South Africa in the post-apartheid struggle).  For the youngest children, here’s a nice list of ten books from Kathleen Cross’s blog, which also model diverse images of beauty our children need to see.

This is the Dream by Diane Z. Shore and Jessica Alexander is perfect for about grade 2 and up – and by up, I mean really up – I showed it to my 16 year old, who also liked it.  The delightful poetic verse along striking illustrations by James Ransome make the harsh realities of institutionalized racism hit home hard.  Then, after a glimpse of courageous civil rights heroes, the picture of the world as we know it today (imperfect but better) depicts a contrast that’s particularly striking. My eight-year old daughter read it over and over again.  Another lovely and inspiring one is Martin’s Big Words: The Life of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

There’s a lot to learn and appreciate on this theme.  Many books have been written of excellent quality.  Just go on either of these amazon book pages and scroll down to “customers who bought this item also bought” to find other titles of interest.  Then you can borrow from the library, buy on that site or go to your independent bookseller.

“Meet” more heroes. Beyond learning about Dr. King, I find it’s crucial to teach my children about a wide range of African-American visionaries, scientists, poets, philosophers, and inventors. In one speech Dr. King said, “We’re going to let our children know that the only philosophers that lived were not Plato and Aristotle, but W.E.B. Du Bois and Alain Locke came through the universe.” And beyond Rosa Parks, what about Robert Hayden, Robert Smalls, Ruth Simmons or Wilma Rudolph?

Pray.  If you pray or meditate, include race unity in your thoughts and prayers.  Racism is a spiritual disease, and a simple meditation to keep in mind can be:   “… welcome all with the light of unity.” It is offered in this context:

“The diversity in the human family should be the cause of love and harmony, as it is in music where many different notes blend together in making the perfect chord. If you meet those of different race and color from yourself, do not mistrust them and withdraw into your shell of conventionality, but rather be glad and show them kindness. Think of them as different colored roses growing in the beautiful garden of humanity, and rejoice to be among them.”

James Taylor’s song honoring Dr. King is like a prayer.  Listen and watch here.

Everyday @Home. An important lesson for any family that wishes to raise global citizens, free of prejudice, is to take the lesson home.  Don’t just leave it up to your school to offer all the lessons and experiences around Dr. King and racial justice (even if your school is doing a great job with this lesson).  Actions you take at home send a powerful signal that “this matters to us.”  And kids who grow up marking MLK Day with a parent or family member will cherish the holiday and what it stands for.  They’re the ones who will build the better world we all long for.

Do you have ideas for marking MLK Day? Please share here, or on Growing Up Global’s Facebook Page or Twitter.

Posted in Africa, Barack Obama, Dr. Martin Luther King, Global education, Golden Rule, Holidays, Human Rights, Interfaith, Prejudice | 3 Comments »